We Got Alot of Work To Do

Photo taken by Creative Soul Photography 

I went to a diversity summit the other day and something happened that always happens, the few black people that were in attendance all found one another and sat together. It's a moment that is reaffirming. The conversation turns more comfortable and even though we were each in different places in our careers we found extreme commonality in our stories. Our experiences working in higher ed converged and overlapped in specific ways. These sorts of events are meant to be perfect for networking but there is a flaw.

Diversity summits ask participants to discuss racism, sexism, diversity, and inclusion. They report statistics and then task the room with coming up with tactical maneuvers to "fix" the disparities. This is always an impossible goal because unless an institution has strategic goals in place, unless the institutions very values are equity, justice, and inclusion, individual efforts will fall short. Systemic change is needed to bring about systemic change. This may sound like such meetings are tedious but I would argue that they are also dangerous.

As a person of color at these meetings, we are rarely included in the planning of or the list of speakers. This means that we are asked to sit quietly while a nonmarginalized group member explains racism, classism, and sexism to us. We are supposed to sit there and be triggered as our black history is reduced to slavery. We are tasked with being patient and silent.

Remember this is a work event, those present were there during their work day, getting paid to be there. So even if we are offended are we allowed to show it? Can we speak out? The answer is no, I had people turning around when the black corner got too loud. I was shushed, I was spoken to. It reminded me of all the studies that have shown that when white students speak out of turn, interrupt, seem enthusiastic, they are labeled as leaders and ambitious where as black students exhibiting the same behaviors are labeled as disruptive, distracting, and as having behavioral issues. So what to do?

The conundrum is, do I code switch? In this moment where I am representing my organization, do I smile and nod as speakers offend me? As they force me to listen to their privileged understanding of what it must be like to be subjected to racism? Do I try and ignore the irony that they looked over speakers of color and instead chose a nonnarginalized group member to co-opt my very real experiences? Do I stand up with my black skin and say, enough is enough? Those of us in attendance, realized we all had too much to lose so instead we did what we could, we sat next to one another, exchanged contact information, and created a space of safety.

I'm tired of pretending everything is okay when people that look like me are dying. I'm tired of being polite when families are being separated. I'm tired of doing the same thing when decade after decade we know it's not working. I refuse to sit quietly and smile as you disrespect me. It's not okay. Call me unprofessional, but how can we dismantle paternalistic practices? How can we better reach our students who are coming from diverse backgrounds if we can't even support our staff and faculty as they are? People of color shouldn't feel like they have to huddle together because they feel attacked. We shouldn't have to "group up" because we know our suggestions won't be heard by others. We shouldn't have to alter our behavior because we are afraid of how we will be perceived and how that very much can be used against us. Going to a work event shouldn't be a justification for putting on our battle gear; straightened hair, painted face, hosiery, business casual and anything else needed to look as non-black and non-threatening as we can just so we don't get stopped by security at the door.

This level of code switching is often seen as acceptable, paying your dues, but for people of color it never ends. The length of your career you're wondering, have I proven myself enough? Have I shown everyone that I am the acceptable negro yet? Can I finally show up to work in casual wear? Can I finally rock my natural hair? Can I finally get upset at work and not be called an instigator? Can I stop being the only person that is tasked with speaking about diversity? Have I jumped through enough hoops? This is what it is to be a marginalized group member in the workforce.

While it is a battle, other people's perceptions cannot dictate us. Searching for allies is also not our job. True allies will find you and they will demonstrate time and time again, through their actions, without coaching or prompting, that they have your back. Making others comfortable should also stop being the job of the employee. If you are hired and passed your probationary period, show your real self. You are qualified and deserve to be there. You are valid just as you are. The way you speak, the way you dress, the music you listen to, does not need to change. Anyone that says it does needs to go speak with HR.

FYI: if you are at an event and you see all the people of color sitting together, it means you have made a grave mistake. You haven't made them feel comfortable, you haven't engaged them, you haven't included them. If we are in a pack we are scared, insecure and annoyed. We have retreated. Ask yourself, who was speaking the most? Who was praised? And who did you speak to? If, "a person of color, a person living with a disability, a person who is in the LGBTQ community," wasn't your answer to any of those questions, then you aren't having a meeting about diversity.



Want to learn how to respond to microaggressions when you hear or encounter them? Whether you are an ally, a LGBTQIA+ community member, or racially marginalized person, this workshop is for you. Register here.